green and greener
i am dreading the end of this year.
2012 has been fairly easy for me. it feels like everything that happened was meant to happen and there was a clear path and a real goal. my location was predetermined due to what i had to do this whole year. though i must admit that this goal took me away from where i ultimately wanted to be (hopefully only for the time being), at least i had the certainty of where i needed to be because of it. eventually, i obtained my postgraduate degree and therefore, reached my goal.
but now... what? what am i supposed to do? where am i supposed to be?
a lot of my friends told me that they would kill to be in my shoes. having the choice to be where i wanted to be and to do what i wanted to do. but the way i see it, i would rather be groomed to do something specific. whether it be taking over a business, or having something i was really good at. that would take away any question of what path i should take and therefore make my life much easier. i wanted a path that has been paved for me, a path i can just follow.
but perhaps the paved path that i'm trying to describe is not career specific. it's really more of a spiritual one. the path of destiny... or... fate.
why is it that people surrounding me seem to be gliding through life, going through each stage of life when they are supposed to and with little to no hesitation? things seem to happen to them quite naturally, the way society expects it to happen. where did i go wrong to make my own life so much more difficult and complicated?
so my hope for 2013 is that god will be more forgiving and go easy on me this year... give me more blatant hints and signs pointing to the best path for me.
2012 has been fairly easy for me. it feels like everything that happened was meant to happen and there was a clear path and a real goal. my location was predetermined due to what i had to do this whole year. though i must admit that this goal took me away from where i ultimately wanted to be (hopefully only for the time being), at least i had the certainty of where i needed to be because of it. eventually, i obtained my postgraduate degree and therefore, reached my goal.
but now... what? what am i supposed to do? where am i supposed to be?
a lot of my friends told me that they would kill to be in my shoes. having the choice to be where i wanted to be and to do what i wanted to do. but the way i see it, i would rather be groomed to do something specific. whether it be taking over a business, or having something i was really good at. that would take away any question of what path i should take and therefore make my life much easier. i wanted a path that has been paved for me, a path i can just follow.
but perhaps the paved path that i'm trying to describe is not career specific. it's really more of a spiritual one. the path of destiny... or... fate.
why is it that people surrounding me seem to be gliding through life, going through each stage of life when they are supposed to and with little to no hesitation? things seem to happen to them quite naturally, the way society expects it to happen. where did i go wrong to make my own life so much more difficult and complicated?
so my hope for 2013 is that god will be more forgiving and go easy on me this year... give me more blatant hints and signs pointing to the best path for me.
