cruising

Driving alone through suburban streets has gotta be one of my favorite things to do. When my mood or thoughts turns frightful or flabbergasted with uncertainty, I would try to make time to cruise around somewhere.

For some reason the act of driving always calms me down. It puts me in sort of a trance. I feel detached from the outside world, as if I'm invisible to others but at the same time ultra aware of myself. It's also when I feel the most confident because I'm honest with myself. What does that say about me exactly? Probably that I'm extremely introverted, the fact that I can feel the most sure of myself when I'm confined within a small space, not having to answer to anybody.

Life is happening all around me, yet I can choose whether to let the sounds of reality in or not. Or I can choose to have electronica music be my backdrop or jazz. basically I'm in control. I choose what to think about and where to go. It lets me know that everything will be all right, regardless of the state I was in before getting into the driver's seat. I can sit and think and drive for hours on end. Call it a place of retreat, recharge, of getting reacquainted with myself again, of escape.

Today's one of those days.