uncooperative tears

I have been feeling intermittently out of sorts for the past week, so I thought maybe I needed a good heartfelt crying session. That is, a nice bawl, weep, whatever, as long as it is done with reckless abandon. It's a bodily function just like any other, it's just that some people need it more often, or longer, than others. So, all alone in my own little shack, I sat myself down, put on some appropriate music, and gave it a go. It soon became apparent that all I was doing was making huffing sounds, and forcing it never really works.

So, I traveled back, mentally, through the recent weeks. Then, I got a little frustrated and tried to work myself up into sobs over tragic historical events (like the Trojan War, Hitler's rise to power, the Treaty of Versailles), and still failed -- I was never much emotionally attached to historical events. As a last resort, I tried to think of movie endings that had made me cry in the past, or at least choked me up, but then I got to "Lost in Translation," which was wholly detrimental to my cause because the ending wasn't sad to begin with, and then I just started giggling at miscellaneous other parts. It appears I have nothing to cry about, and plenty that does not warrant tears -- a very bad thing as far as achieving this morning's goal goes.

Ah, well. Guess I'll just have to resign myself to believe that I'll be okay soon.